Sometimes Changemaking is Cleaning Toilets
+ Autumn coaching questions, invitations, and stuff you'd probably like to know to equip you
Hey friend who cares about making a better world,
Do you ever feel like you can only contain the bullet points of life? Often my journals are filled with them, just brain-dumping all the thoughts. I hope I can attend to them in depth later, but at times I can’t.
If you’re also running between volleyball games and preparing for holiday dinners, while trying to skim the headlines, get a paycheck, care for yourself/family, and still make a difference—you’re not alone. That’s who we are here, real life people. We’re the everyday changemakers and so frequently we can only hold the outlines of information.
I don’t know about you, but I’m always trying to figure out how to love others and live in my purpose from a place of rest.
This past week, for me, it was by cleaning toilets.
Below is the content I believe will empower you as a changemaker in your purpose, message of hope, and as you do good better this NOVEMBER.
What’s In This Edition of The Table:
The Virtue of Cleaning Toilets
Coaching Question For Autumn
World Changers United: NOVEMBER
Changes you really must learn about
Everyday Misogynists
No Hustle November
1. The Virtue of Cleaning Toilets
More than once I’ve read stories or heard preachers uplifting the unseen value of the people cleaning the toilets in faithful service. At first I was pulled into these narratives:
“Look at these humble servants! Their work goes unnoticed! But they are willing to give of themselves in whatever way, regardless. You should also clean the toilets!”
And it is true—first, that there is equal dignity in all work. Secondly, learning to serve in the background, doing what needs to be done without accolades, is part of developing some of the essential characteristics of being a changemaker. As we say around here, “Humility changes the world.”
But I took these messages in a direction that wasn’t helpful. I viewed this—the faithful background work of cleaning toilets—as just one more thing to add to everything else. This meant that not only was I speaking for the event, preparing the food, doing the marketing, organizing the donations—now I need to be cleaning the toilets too. For this is what good world-changers do.
Once, at an anti-trafficking fundraiser I was throwing, my friends pulled me aside.
“Elisa, you need to go and be social. Stop trying to do everything else. We can do the cleaning, organizing, feeding, etc… but you are the person here who knows about human trafficking. And you’re good at talking to people. Get out on the floor and stop worrying about everything else. We’ve got it.”
This moment was life-altering for me. Guess why?
(Finish reading about how I ended up clearing toilets here)
2. Coaching Questions for Autumn
These questions are designed to help you consider who you’re going to be and how you’ll spend your energy this autumn. Be honest and gentle:
Notice what you’re consuming: What’s feeding me right now and what’s draining me? Am I fueling myself in a healthy way—including how I stay socially aware and involved?
Attend to your spirit: What is an emotion I need to express, something I must lament, or an area I need to intentionally heal in before it eats me up?
Foster a supportive environment: What is one way I can connect with others and create joyful memories this autumn?
Be aware of your pace: Where do I need to soften or slow down—how can I nourish myself and my family through activity and rest this autumn?
Challenge generosity while being honest about your limits: What am I willing to give in response to the world? In what way can I create space to show care for my community, country, and world?
Reply to this email or tell me in the comments the answer to one of these questions!
3. World Changers United: NOVEMBER
June has plenty of impact-focused days and topics to rally around! So does July! I am convinced you already care about at least some of these!
I am all about not reinventing the wheel, overcoming hindrances, complications, and engaging in changemaking the easiest possible way from our real and busy lives. This is why I want to make sure you know what to connect with!
Can you start by telling us one way you will join others in making a difference with a little action?
LEARN HOW FOR NOVEMBER:
December will go up soon, so keep an eye out!
4. Changes you really must learn about
If you live in the U.S., there have been so many changes in our current administration affecting the flourishing of our neighbors that it is hard to keep track. We often only see what the news zooms in on, making it is easy to miss some of the other things that are happening.
Here are two things that caught my eye this month and why we get to care about them. As I am far from an expert on any of these subjects, I link below to others I respect who we can learn from:
Did you know research shows an essential need for women in global conflict reduction? Rachel Wein makes a case for the now dismantled Office of Global Women’s Issues in her More to Her Story op-ed (just scroll the the slides).
Amy Julia Becker states, “it matters to our whole society that kids with disabilities continue to receive the support and services they deserve.” in her article about what’s happening to special education (I particularly love how our shared value of human flourishing shines in this piece). With only 10% of staff remaining in the Office of Special Education, this is something we need to become aware of. I was particularly surprised I didn’t realize how much has changed considering I have children receiving special education services. Did you know this?
As always, my goals isn’t to distress you with more to lament and feel anger about, but to equip you. As you take in this information, let’s move on to #5, below.
5. No Hustle November
While the world keeps spinning fast and unjustly, your soul might be needing something slower, steadier, and more sustainable. You’re allowed to be well, too.
Before the end of the month, we’ll dive into No Hustle November here at “The Table” with our annual theme of restful changemaking—be sure to open that email! I’m sorry I didn’t send you an earlier invitation to participate in No Hustle November, but there was a valid reason: I was focusing on my own non-hustle (but I wrote about this on my other substack, Elisa S. Johnston here). Still, despite the late invitation, I want to make sure you know it is on! All you have to do to participate is:
Take on the intention to resist the hustle
Model and talk about this when you can—ultimately we’re slowly changing the culture of social impact spaces to be restful.
Learn more about No Hustle November here.
6. Everyday Misogynists
Because I believe women have equal value to men, that makes me a feminist.1 We need the same respect, protections, and opportunities.
But despite this, I’ve always tripped over the term Misogamy, which is the dislike of, hate of, ingrained prejudice against, or the lesser valuing of women.2 Its possible I was put off by this word because it’s felt so pretentious to me. Or maybe its because it goes with my decades of “junk” I’ve experienced as a woman. Calling these experiences what they are (and having been gaslit for that) still feels risky, despite how many years I’ve leaned into healing.3
But I don’t think it’s just me. A huge segment of our population, including women themselves, have a hard time not being misogynistic (likely without realizing they are).
Once I was leading a study among a mixed group of both progressives and conservatives. I asked everyone to show up the following week prepared to share a struggle that, as a vulnerable population, women experience. As there are so many social issues women face globally and in the United States, I thought this was an easy ask.
What surprised me was how difficult this exercise was for this group of women. They genuinely thought women and men were treated equally and didn’t realize how women still serious experience discrimination, violence, contempt, etc… And this was coming from a room where I knew some of the women within lived in unhealthy power balances where their say wasn’t valued.
It became evident for me that not only did I need to continue on my own healing journey when it came to how I viewed myself as a woman, but that I had to talk about it loud and clear when I could. I decided to share my own stories of healing, and continue advocating for women everywhere to experience what was good and just.
One of the writers in my guild Dorothy Littell Greco, released a book in the last few weeks—For the Love of Women: Uprooting and Healing Misogamy in America. Given my commitment to empowering women, I jumped on to help promote her book.
I’m still reading through it, but I wanted to make sure you had a chance to get a copy. Greco doesn’t mess around as she works to help us understand that injustice is still often viewed as normal, giving us a chance and path to healing. Get a copy from your preferred bookstore by going to this link here.
With encouragement to resist the hustle and care for yourself as you work to help others flourish,
-Elisa Johnston
If you’re interested in growing in confidence, wholeness, and impact in your message, purpose, or practice of doing good better—I’m your woman!
Coaching-Consulting Info | Book Here
I regularly have people tell me their worst view of a feminist assuming this is what I am relating too. Sadly, somehow a version of feminism that has become imprinted in some minds is one of bloody demonstrations of killing babies and burning bras and hating men. Nope. So in case you need to know this, this isn’t what the majority of feminists mean when they declare themselves as one.
Here’s a more official definition of Misogyny: https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/misogyny
Here’s the beginning of when I began Confronting My Junk As a Christian Woman
That moment when your friends pulled you aside sounds transformative. So many of us fall into the trap of thinking we hav to prove our commitment by doing all the behnd-the-scenes work when really our unique voice is what's needed most. The metaphor works perfectly becuse we all know that person who insists on doing everything instead of trusting others with their strengths.